Observations and inanities by a second-shift assistant supervisor in the Puppy-Grinding division of the Evil Atheist Conspiracy® (our motto: "Sure it's cruel, but think of the jobs!"), your host, Brent Rasmussen.
Texas Crazy: Attack of the Evo-atheists!
Things are getting really scary in Texas. I'm not kidding. Something is bubbling in the Lone Star State, and it has the stink of 100 percent pure crazy.
First, science communicator Bill Nye was booed during a lecture in Waco for insisting that the Moon reflected light from the Sun. Then we have Chuck Norris advocating for secession and installing himself as president of Texas, presumably as part of Glenn Beck's lunatic "let's bring back the utter terror we all felt after 9/11" faux-movement ("We surround them" he assures his nitwit followers).
But you already knew about that, right?
Tonight I discovered a couple more things that scared the hell out of me. This post will cover the first, because I don't want to give anyone any ulcers.
Publishers Newswire informs me that Don McLeroy, Chair of the Texas State Board of Education (yes, that board of education) is recommending to his fellow board members a book called Sowing Atheism: The National Academy of Sciences' Sinister Scheme to Teach Our Children They're Descended from Reptiles. Oh yes, my friends. The press release, obviously designed to keep me up at night, says:
McLeroy’s timely recommendation could influence the board’s final decision on the science curriculum scheduled for March 27. The Texas decision will determine what is printed in science textbooks nationwide.
The book (you can read the whole thing, if you hate yourself that much, here in PDF form) is written by Robert Bowie Johnson, Jr., who the press release boasts holds a "general science degree," whatever that means, and he accuses the "evo-atheists" in the National Academy of "seduction and deception" in their attempts to indoctrinate our youth with evolution. ("Evo-atheists?" I guess every group sounds scarier when you give them a hyphenated prefix -- but count me among them either way.)
More from the press release:
In his book, Johnson shows that the NAS cannot pick any one of the two million or so living species and identify the species from which it allegedly evolved, nor can the NAS produce any evidence for the alleged evolution of the sexes. Further, Johnson points out, the NAS admits it lacks a “plausible hypothesis” for the origin of life.
Look, I just read The Selfish Gene by militant evo-atheist Richard Dawkins, and he seemed to have those questions pretty well covered. And that was written thirty years ago. Catch up, Johnson! Put that general science degree to work!
But I really can't scare you until you read the first paragraph of Chapter 1 of Sowing Atheism:
Imagine yourself standing in the administrative offices of your local junior high school. You are there to bring a forgotten lunch to one of your children. Two tall, forbidding men enter wearing black business suits with red-letter NAS (National Academy of Sciences) armbands. They sneer and brush past you. They ignore the receptionist and the other people working there, and head straight for the principal’s office. Just as the startled educator looks up at the intruders, both slam their fists on his desk. In unison, they cry, “We represent infallible science. You must teach these children that they are descended from reptiles. It is impossible to disprove our findings, and wrong to challenge them; therefore, no other point of view will be tolerated.”
Okay, okay. Breathe.
I have to give you one last spook on this subject, and it's a visual. Take a look at the cover of Sowing Atheism.
HOLY CRAP! THAT SNAKE IS TOTALLY GONNA EAT THOSE CUTE WHITE KIDS!!!
If you can stand it, click here to get a better view. By looks of things, the snake is either spouting evil Darwinist lies, or is very nauseous and about to regurgitate a couple of recently-digested Christian children. The little girl seems like she wants to tell the snake what-for, but I have to tell you, I think the little boy is interested in hearing what the snake has to say. I think he wants to know if there are weaknesses in the creation theory. He's really taking it in. Evo-atheist in the making, I'd say.
Honestly, this is a very serious topic (not that you'd get that from this post) because even though all of this is risible, there is a real battle being fought here, because the standards imposed by Texas on textbook publishers will wind up affecting school systems all over the country. So in a sense, the state of our national education system is being held at snake-point by these nutbags. It's a subject that requires serious attention and effort.
But for tonight, I just wanted to scare you.
How'd I do?
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[Cross-post from my column at Examiner.com]