Observations and inanities by a second-shift assistant supervisor in the Puppy-Grinding division of the Evil Atheist Conspiracy® (our motto: "Sure it's cruel, but think of the jobs!"), your host, Brent Rasmussen.
I can't get over how gullible some people are. As a skeptic, I find it absolutely ridiculous that anyone would believe in psychics, palm readers, tarot card readers etc... However, this kind of nonsense is a multi million (maybe billion?) dollar industry in America. Welcome to the Unenlightenment!
The Unenlightenment is an era in which centuries of rational thought are thrown away and the world is ruled by superstitious idiots. They are everywhere. Homeopathy, horoscopes, chakras, karma, praying to imaginary gods all the while rejecting science.
When reading this Dear Abby column, I laughed my ass off. Does that make me evil? I do feel sorry for the poor woman's genuine anxiety, but still I almost feel she deserves it for believing in something so absurd.
DEAR ABBY: I have found the man I will be with for the rest of my life. I knew from the moment I met him that he was The One. We are very happy and very much in love.
Ever since I was about 9, my mother and I have had our palms read, our tarot cards done, charted our birth signs, etc. It's a little superstitious, but hey -- we have fun with it. We still do it to this day.
When I was 17, our palm reader proceeded to tell me about my life and explained that I will have two husbands, and my first husband will die. Abby, I can't stop thinking about this, and when I do I can't hold back the tears. I can't tell my boyfriend because, as anyone would, he'll think I am being silly.
I wouldn't take this so seriously if the palm reader hadn't been so accurate regarding past experiences in my life. I need some sort of relief from my fear because I'm afraid that when we're married I'll always be waiting for the day my husband doesn't come home. Please help me. -- MISERABLE IN MILWAUKEE
More below the fold...
Yeah, one day your husband will stop coming home, not because of an accident, but because you are ca-RA-zee! Lets see how Abby handles this one:
DEAR MISERABLE: I live in a community where psychics and palm readers are as omnipresent as head lice. While some of them can be remarkably accurate in their predictions, others are charlatans. What your letter illustrates is that while palm reading, tarot, etc. can make for lively entertainment, superstition can be a powerful and destructive force.
May I point out that statistically most women outlive men. Viewed in that light, what your psychic told you wasn't necessarily bad news. It could be interpreted to mean that you will have a long and happy union with the man you love. And when he predeceases you -- as most men do -- you will once again find love. And, honey, from my perspective, that's GOOD news.
Abby is just as bad as the psychic and just as crazy as the women who came to her for help. What's this "some are accurate, some are charlatans" crap? It's a good thing this woman didn't ask me for advice. I would have told her to do civilization a favor and slap herself in the face repeatedly until the superstition is beaten out of her brain.
I'll probably catch some flak for this, but I am actually curious. Why do women predominantly fall for this? I know that I am stereotyping and there are certainly exceptions, but I really don't hear about very many men visiting psychics or getting their palms read. Do men favor some other type of woo?