Observations and inanities by a second-shift assistant supervisor in the Puppy-Grinding division of the Evil Atheist Conspiracy® (our motto: "Sure it's cruel, but think of the jobs!"), your host, Brent Rasmussen.
There has been a lot of interesting commentary on atheist activism from very disparate sources over the past couple days, and a theme is emerging: How atheists hurt the feelings of the religious.
First there has been a long series of entries on Andrew Sullivan's blog concerning the merits of faith mockery, mostly in the form of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. This has directly seeded other discussions on the same topic at places like the League of Ordinary Gentlemen, where there are posts by various authors, and I have commented on a couple of them. Meanwhile, a book review by Jerry Coyne in the New Republic, which I can't recommend highly enough, has also spurred many a blog conversation at such places as the American Scene (home of Alan Jacobs, writer of one of my favorite--and now defunct--blogs, TextPatterns).
One of the more interesting pieces I've come across comes from the United Church Observer, a small church publication from Canada, which places one of its journalists reluctantly aboard a cruise for the Atheist Alliance International convention. There, Jocelyn Bell comes to some important realizations about hernonbelieving neighbors (sorry, it's Canada: neighbours).
Les over at Stupid Evil Bastard seems to attract the creationist morons like a flame attracts moths. He has had a hilarious, but frustrating email exchange with an ignorant youngster named "Paolo" who seems to suffer from uncontrollable creationist cut-n-paste syndrome.
It'd be funny if it weren't so depressing.
In any case, one of Les' commenters, a person using the handle "Mayo", came up with a fantastic idea for a gritty new creationist crime drama. You think Fox's new faith-based TV network will pick it up?
[Mayo] Here’s a typical T.V. detective movie in Paolo's world.
Detective- We found your fingerprints all over the murder weapon.
Criminal- Did you actually see me use it?
Detective- No....but the prints are undeniable.
Criminal- You have NO PROOF. You saw nothing.
Detective- Look fella...your semen is all over the place. We’ve matched your DNA.
Criminal- If you didn’t actually observe the semen leaving my body....what you’re spewing is just a theory. YOU HAVE NO PROOF!
Detective- What about these footprints which perfectly match your highly rare shoe type?
Criminal- Did you see me step there?
Detective- Not exactly.
Criminal- You’ve got no proof then. You’re just guessing.....badly.
Detective- You have blood which matches the victim all over you. How do you explain that?
Criminal- Did you see this blood get on me?
Detective- No. The spray pattern and condition of the blood all point to the fact that you must have been in the path of the bleeding artery at the time and place where the victim was killed though.
Criminal- More guessing. Is there anything else you’re any good at? You may want to consider a new line of work.
Detective- I guess you can go now. Sorry to have bothered you. Roll credits.
[link] Bobby Henderson, the author of the "OPEN LETTER TO THE KANSAS SCHOOL BOARD." is about to embark on the creation of an Enlightenment Institute, and as such realizes that it is, indeed, the voices of the followers of FSM that need to be heard. Here, he is interested in collecting evidence and arguments (specious or perhaps with a hint of fact) that support the existence of the FSM. In that vein, the SCQ is pleased to present this call for submissions, whereby 5 of Bobby's favourites will be presented on the pages of the SCQ in late January 2006. Furthermore, the most compelling piece will be awarded $100 worth of Ramen noodles (which by our estimates, equates to approximately 1000 packets). Please send all submissions to email@example.com by December 25th, 2005 (subject line: Ramen) and may his noodly appendage grace your presence and touch you.
Sounds like oodles of noodly fun!
Now you can know the awesome feeling of being a floating, all-powerful mass of pasta, marinara, and sausage meat. Flying Spaghetti Monster - The game!
By KARYN HURTSHOG
Bobby Henderson gets two questions from almost any audience that hears him speak about creation versus evolution:
How do you explain radiometric dating, what most people call "carbon dating," of fossils and rocks, which holds the earth to be ancient?
And what about Pirates?
Henderson, who holds a negligible degree in physics and is the author of "Open Letter To Kansas School Board," developed responses to those and other questions as part of courses he has taught at FSM Life College, Oregon, USA, and in six months of speaking at more than 15 churches and/or blogs in the United States, Chile, Brazil, France, Chad, Greater Ubekistan, and Tasmania.
Henderson is in Marksbiz as part of the Church Of The Flying Spaghetti Monster's "Stiffen Your Limp Noodle" conference. He is scheduled to give two more presentations, today and Wednesday at 7 p.m., at the church, 27th Place and Avenue Z, Marksbiz.
Henderson has what he describes as an aptitude for science; he was also, as a sophomore in college, "touched by His Noodly Appengage, which changed my whole pursuit from wanting to make money to helping people," he said, "and, of course, making even more money by helping people see the wonder and majesty of the Flying Spaghetti Monster's low-low priced merchandise on sale at my website."